relationships(2/5)
Steps to interactive gratitude
Step 1) Gratitude from me to God Take a moment right now and prayerfully ask the Spirit to help you remember a moment of gratitude. This memory can be anything that comes to your mind. It can be something simple that happened during the day or a theme you have encountered many times. When something comes to mind, take time to write down what you are thankful for in a conversational manner with God.…
Doing right things can lead to wrong things when our relational circuits are off
Our solution to solving problems with our [relational circuits] off is to do the right thing rather than restore relationships. Doing many right things with your [relational circuits] off can lead to doing very wrong things when it comes to restoring relationships in the Kingdom of God.
Relational circuits checklist
Relational Circuits Checklist (Are our RCs on or off?) I just want to make a problem, person or feeling go away. I don’t want to listen to what others feel or say. My mind is “locked onto” something upsetting. I don’t want to be connected to [blank]. (Someone I usually like) I just want to get away, fight, or freeze. (verses Calm + Connect) I more aggressively interrogate, judge and fix others.…
Thought rhyming sequence
Thought rhyming takes participants through five steps from God’s perspective as God offers attunement to His children. In distress, God helps us restore our [relational circuits] and peace. Through the Immanuel journaling process, God brings healing to the broken interactions (misattunements) we experienced in life. Suppose we need to start our thought rhyming while we are feeling upset about something; we can use the following sequence. I can see you I can hear you I can understand how hard this is for you I am glad to be with you I can do something about what you are going through (steps and order borrowed from Exodus 3:7-8a)
There is a fear most parents share
There’s a fear I presume most parents share: that your child will be so different from you that you’ll never truly connect. You’ll love them no matter what; you know that to be true. But a part of you — perhaps the more selfish part — also wants to find common ground. You want a shared interest, something to talk about, some private ritual, some inside joke, something to reinforce the genetic lifeline between you.…
Leaders initiate relationships
Leaders initiate connections with their people. Maxwell’s analogy about the locomotive expresses a key point about leadership - the leader must initiate a connection with his followers. The leader who sits in his office will never build the relationship necessary with his people to inspire trust and respect in his people. “Great leaders don’t expect their people to move forward and latch on to them. Instead, they reach out to people, no matter where they are, and work to make a connection.…
Foster trust with both performance and vulnerability
Both cognitive and affective trust are required to make business relationships thrive. “What events led you to trust [your colleagues and friends]?” writes Meyer (pg. 167). For an American, the answer depends on the person. Friendships in the United States are established in affective trust, built slowly over shared interests as each party lets their guard down and shares their true feelings, negative or positive. Business relationships; however, are another story.…