I’ve enjoyed this holiday season more than last year by a wide margin. However, I’m still weary of being tired for days with little to show for it.
I am daunted by this new year and unsure of myself as I enter it. Tonight we’ll do some goal setting which usually helps; putting it all in the table and sorting out the best from the good often relieves the burden of over-the-limit dreams.
Anyways, for now just gotta eat lunch and take Graham ice skating. Baby steps.
Christmas accomplished. Whew!
Christmas is almost here!
Yesterday I installed the stair railings and blinds so that the guest room is finally complete; just in time for my grandparent’s arrival.
Today I used two skills from high school. Two!
First, geometry. Using the Pythagorean Theorem and SOACATOA (remember that?) I calculated the necessary height of a screw to install a rail.
Second, checking my work. I had to look up all the stuff about cosines and such because I didn’t remember any of it. Even when I applied it, I wasn’t sure that I had it right. So I created a couple control problems and validated my results.
#geometry rocks!
I hit a milestone today. My 500th post on my website! To mark the occasion I’ve written a meta-post to celebrate the achievement.
One week until Christmas!
Amie and I wrapped the stocking-stuffers last night. The boys will be thrilled. With Amie’s dad’s help we’ve finished the bed in the guest bedroom. Our task list is dwindling, although our Christmas cards are doomed to arrive late again this year. I’m enjoying this season way more than last; there’s lots to do but it doesn’t feel like work is all there is.
I’ve been reading the book “Evicted” by Matthew Desmond. You know, some light holiday reading 🙄. The dissonance between my life of relative comfort and ease and the inhuman treatment of the city’s poor strains my credulity in the justice of God. Mostly I feel shame to be treated well without reason when my brothers and sisters are abused without reason.
In my more balanced frames of mind I recognize that, despite the dramatic differences in circumstance, neither the poor nor the rich are liberated. Desmond’s evicted subjects are tempted to flee from the pain of their environment, the guilt of their decisions, and the shame of events over which they had no control. On the other hand, the landlords who enrich themselves from poverty are equally tempted to drown their guilt in platitudes and their shame in diversions. Both are imprisoned, though the blunt chains of the impoverished are more evident than the interior chains of the wealthy.
By this I do not mean either to diminish the culpability of the wealthy for their injustice towards their poor brothers and sisters, nor to valorize the suffering of the poor. This subject is so weighty that it seems impossible to succeed in truth-telling, which is why Desmond’s narrative approach is such an effective medium.
“Evicted” by Matthew Desmond calls to mind a frustration I’ve had for many years. Our society manufactures barriers between us across so many strata: economic, racial, gender, expertise. James enjoins us to care for the needy among us and to show no partiality towards the rich, but we’ve so segregated ourselves, both inside and outside church buildings, that it’s rare even to be in the positions that James describes.
Even when the church community has diversity, interior walls compound our separation further: pride, shame, fear. The rich sit quietly near the poor but say nothing of their wealth for fear of judgment or manipulation. The poor say nothing of their needs for fear of judgment and toxic pity. Between the systemic, external divisions and the equally rampant interior barriers it often feels like we’ll all die alone in wintry darkness, torn to pieces by vicious beasts and riddled with cancerous tumors. No wonder the prophets resort to apocalyptic language when addressing injustice and moral decay.
It’s been awhile since I posted any pictures. Here are a few from the last months which I especially enjoy.
Graham and Royal sang in a little choir production from their school tonight. Graham had been stressed that he didn’t know all the words to “Jingle Bells,” but he did great - he even had hand motions! Royal looked exhausted and just waited awkwardly for the show to end.
My second day off was spent with my sons, and that’s made these some of my favorite days.
Today, Royal and I spent the afternoon together. We visited the Geology museum on the School of Mines campus and saw some spectacular rocks and fossils. Then we went ice skating for the first time.
Doing things with both boys can be fun, but my favorite is when we’re one-on-one. I’m hoping to do something similar with Graham soon; he’ll love the museum and might like ice skating.
Amie and her parents treated us to a date at the symphony last night. And it was glorious!
For me, the symphony is nostalgic. Many of my best memories as a young person were in the symphonic and marching band. I feel the trepidation and excitement when the xylophone rings out, cutting through the whole orchestra. I remember the joy of harmony. I recall marveling at the range and power of each instrument from the backstage view of the percussion section.
The symphony is nostalgic, and it’s also prophetic. The Spirit flows with the music, calling images and memories to my mind’s eye in a way that’s often surprising. That is, in ways I cannot anticipate or control. Those movements in which I expect to receive the strongest impressions can be lifeless to me, and others can bring me to tears with their resonance and imagery. I think that I learned to hear the Spirit’s voice first through music, then recognized the speaker in the Bible.
Lastly, the symphony is nostalgic, prophetic and FUN. At times I struggle to be “proper” because I want to dance and mourn, in all my ungainly, unskilled movements, along with the music. I don’t (in the concert hall at least 😉), but I allow my body to move with the music in my seat. Sometimes I feel self-conscious when I realize that almost no one else is doing the same 😨, but bucking conformity brings it’s own satisfaction. It’s worth discomfort to feel the texture of the music in my flesh.
A big part of what made this symphony especially fun was the Davis Sisters: Dee+Shapeera, Kandra and LaDreeva. Their joy and comfort singing together and the astounding range of their talents is a blessing. My only gripe is that none of the vocals speakers were pointed towards the balcony!
We may be becoming part-time groupies of Kandra and LaDreeva if we keep showing up to their local gigs ♥️.
This weekend we pulled out all the carpet in the house, two rooms and four half-stairs, in preparation for the new carpet installation. The contractors installed it all yesterday!
I’d moved our books out of the bookshelves so I could move them downstairs. I found Graham and Royal sitting on a pile of them and let out a yell so loud Graham immediately started crying. I apologized for scaring Graham.
Next time I need to lower the volume, but I’m finding that yelling gets the rage out faster than stuffing and means I’m capable of responding kindly much sooner (not yelling at, but a loud release of emotion. Amazing what one can learn from one’s own children 🙂).
Amie and I enjoyed a relaxed planning session last night. There’s so much, if the Lord wills, that we anticipate in the new year.
Our downstairs bedroom will finally be complete. Just in time to use as an office for Amie’s counseling work in January. I’ll be starting a postulancy with the Order of the Common Life. I’m learning to let go in order to pursue further Kingdom work. And we’ll be hosting a Christmas party.
While passing the boy’s bathroom this morning I witnessed a horrifying sight. Royal was holding a plastic bag over the toilet with two inches of yellow liquid inside. The bag was dripping and there were several puddles on the floor. #parenting
The ebb and flow of my life can be abrasive, wearing me down like sand upon the smooth stones of the sea shore. My perspective has softened towards myself in the ebb, but I am not fully free of the surges of shame that accompany ebbs or the bursts of unceasing energy that mark flows. I am either an ideal or a poor candidate for a monastic order. It depends on one’s goal.
Yesterday was well spent for an ebb day. I had zero accomplishments but, by simply being a warm body, I could drive Graham and Royal to Heather’s birthday party and handle bedtime so Amie could go to dinner and a play with her father. What a strange tangle are my priorities at times that kindness and service can be discounted while intellectual pursuit is sought.
Royal has for months now been telling us about his kids. Sometimes there are more than two, but Ellie and Eva have been there since the beginning. They’re both five years old and live down the street (usually). They have a knack for arriving wherever we’re talking about, which means they’re often world travelers.
Thanks to Amie buying “Joyful Journey,” I’ve begun to experiment with interactive gratitude. The purpose is two-fold: 1) to multiply the number of positive experiences with the Father in recent memory and 2) to help re-connect me with those I love when my relational circuits have shut down.
I’ve copied the basic instructions to my website at the link below.
https://alexbilson.dev/stones/james-wilder/steps-to-interactive-gratitude/#jump
Amie renewed my New Yorker subscription this week. She loves me so well 🙂 ❤️
For the first time this year a person joined me on one of my Centennial Trail hikes!
Skyler and I managed a 7-mile hike from Brush Creek to Sheridan Lake. It was actually closer to nine miles after we lost the trail and backtracked. My hamstrings are still tight.
Since all my hikes have been alone, I wasn’t sure how to behave. Should we talk, or hike in silence? It turned out to be a mix of both.
I’m grateful to have gotten to know Skyler a little more. We’ve been working together to integrate DBS questions and facilitation techniques into the youth program’s Wednesday meetings. I’d seen his passion for mentorship but I hadn’t grasped his love and expertise in communication. Now I kinda want to work on my public speaking skills; there’s a Toastmaster’s meet up on Saturday mornings I could probably attend.
Amie and Amanda (Skyler’s wife) launched their first DBS group last Thursday. There’s an energizing mix of women, from the well-versed Bible nerds to those with almost no experience in the texts. We’re stoked to watch what the Spirit does with these wonderful people and are praying that their obedience will plant Kingdom seeds to grow through and beyond the MOPS community and the women of Westminster.
On the 13th of September, right before we left for Chicago, Skyler launched this year’s youth ministry at Westminster. I had the joy of collaborating with him on the design and the privilege of helping with the launch. Skyler’s taken the ministry over from Andrew after he followed the Spirit’s leading to pivot towards the Basecamp Climbing Gym community full-time.
We’re equipping Middle School and High School kids to discover the Biblical Jesus in the book of Mark by reading the Bible in community, responding to what we’ve learned and sharing our discoveries with those we know. It’s so exciting!
That first night I facilitated a reading of the first passage in Mark with mostly Middle Schoolers. I wasn’t prepared for how challenging it would be.
One of the strongest personalities interrupted every two minutes asking if it was over yet. I never got the breathing room I’m accustomed to and so the whole time felt rushed and burdensome. I was flustered. When I heard how Skyler’s group of mostly High Schoolers had responded, however, I was encouraged.
I missed the next Wednesday but made it for the third. Again Skyler and I each took a group but this time I had more High Schoolers. So much easier! It was a joy to see everyone participate. We even did a group I WILL: 15 seconds of listening for Jesus' voice. I don’t know what else Jesus may have done in others but I saw the image of a lighthouse. May these folks know themselves to be lights in the world and salt upon the earth!
This Wednesday Skyler and I will take a backseat for another to facilitate. It would be a win if either adults or youth would facilitate, but youth would be the most awesome. I’m asking for God’s courage for Tyler and Selah, and also Becky among the adults.
I’ve been reflecting on how to communicate my own mortality to my boys. It’s had the unexpected affect of turning my view towards those I’ve lost and what I trust has happened to our relationship. I will see them again at the resurrection of the living and the dead, yet their absence from my life pains Jesus as it does myself. Together we will bear the suffering while the Father supplies what I need. And so the Father shall offer my boys when I have passed on.
We consider great literature those books which honor the ambiguously complex nature of life on earth and give room in our hearts to learn from their wisdom. Why should we afford the #Bible any less honor, though we must read with patience a book written by authors from a time and culture distant to our own, writing to an audience distinct from us.
While visiting the Ellos in Arlington Heights David gave us a word. He said our family is like a tornado. While it can seem quiet inside, all those around are getting tossed around and stirred up.
That’s a good word brother. Bring the wind, Spirit, bring the change. Give us the endurance to live inside the storm.
I want to read this paper in-depth. Ethan Mollick has been instrumental to my growing understanding of the introduction of generic AI to all, and specifically how it affects education.
What is it about arriving in Chicago that stirs up so much resistance?
We were hanging out with the Ellos, reflecting on our family’s sudden illness that just happened to coincide with our drive to Chicago, when we realized that all our crazy stories occur, not on the way out of Chicago, but on the way back.
This realization stirs up my rebel side. I wanna move back just to send a message, “You can’t push me around.”
Anyways, we’ve all been ill since the day before we drove out. Almost every meet up we’ve hoped for was cancelled, either because we were sick or they were (it seems the whole world is sick this week). My original reason for driving to Chicago, to attend my work’s IT conference in person, was almost completely invalidated. I spent the first day in the dining room of our AirBnB tuned into the conference online. But, even though I only had five broken hours of sleep last night, I’m in the office now. As we say in our household, “Bilson’s can do hard things.”
Amie and Royal have horrific poison ivy rashes. Royal on his left cheek, but it’s spread to his left hand and maybe his legs. Amie on her chest, but now her face, both arms, her neck and belly. Amie thinks her case may have gotten into her blood stream; how else do we explain how it pops up in disparate parts of her body without further exposure? She’s on her way to urgent care… again. Hopefully this time they’ll give her a full month’s course. Nothing else has worked 😫
“Write about what interests you.”
What interests me right now are video games and the TV show Suits. I wouldn’t write about them because they’re not important enough. They’re entertainment.
Except that I’m an analyst. Where others watch a show or play a game and happily move on, I must master it. If it’s a game: memorize the tactics and devise the perfect strategy. If it’s a show, ascertain the characters next moves and the writer’s plot structure. So should I write about these topics too?
Our September will be packed. It begins with Amie traveling to the East Coast for a wedding. Then I train a group of adults and high schoolers in the Discovery Bible Study method (I’m really excited about this). After that we drive to Chicago for a week of visiting and a work conference. And I might try to squeeze in a day hike.
For our ninth anniversary Amie and I returned to Skogen Kitchen and, for the first time in our lives, we tried foie gras.
We’d wondered about this dish ever since reading about it in one of Ruth Reichl’s books, but rarely see it on the menu.
This is also likely the last time I will ever eat it.
My dad and Shawna visited the second weekend in July.
One lunch we spent at a firehouse restaurant up in the Black Hills. Graham and Royal climbed all over every firetruck they had parked outside and into every compartment.
We visited the candy store afterward. To our surprise, not only did we find candy, but also this enormous moth! Royal insisted we take it home.
Another time we went on a cave tour.
It was a short trip, but everyone had a great time!
In Amie’s Present Play cohort (now called Hi Fam! I believe) she’s chosen a three-month project to hold a special weekly meal called “family feast.” It’s a meal that, more than any other, is for connection and tradition. We had our fourth meal yesterday.
We’ve made adjustments every week since we began, trying to find a time, food, and location that’s conducive to mutual enjoyment. I don’t think we’ve quite figured it out yet.
Amie and I have finished Trenton Lee Stewart’s “The Mysterious Benedict Society” boxed set. I’m sorry to see it go; we really enjoyed them.
We’ve begun a trilogy about a family’s life on the island of Corfu. Although we’re only a chapter in, there’s an exceptional quality to the writing. And it’s funny. Gerald Durrell has keen perception to say the least.
Amie is growing a number of edible plants in pots on our front porch, such as jalapeños.
Yesterday, Royal had found a plucked jalapeño and mistakenly bit a swallowed a chunk. He was in agony while we tried to figure out what had happened until Amie noticed the half-eaten jalapeño on the floor. Once we knew what was going on I rubbed ice on Royal’s lips for almost a half hour until the oily burn finally subsided.
If Royal’s other choices are any indication this will not deter him from trying again, even another jalapeño.
I’ve been at a low ebb with writing for the last month or two. It’s a normal fluctuation for me, and all my previous writing is still available (and free of charge, woot!), but I still find it discouraging when it happens. Mostly because I can’t tell when or how writing returns.
The first week of July Amie, Graham, Royal and I went on our first ever family camp! It was at Camp Rimrock. Amie grew up attending camps like this one, but it was a first for the rest of us.
We stayed in a rustic cabin. We’d heard that, because we had almost fifty families attending, we might have to share cabins. But we got the whole cabin to ourselves. Yes!
Graham climbed the tallest mountain yet, all by himself. Royal rode on my shoulders the entire way. When it was time to go back down, however, Graham cried the whole way. He was upset about not getting to be the lead hiker and was feeling nervous about slipping and falling. But he made it - way to go Graham!
Graham was stoked about being at camp when we arrived, but the next day brought tears. Neither he nor Royal wanted to participate in any activity the entire morning, but a switch flipped in the late afternoon. Graham had a lot of broken expectations, especially about hiking, that took some time to learn and talk through. Still, they never did warm up to camp activities before noon, lol. Royal was the most tired I’ve ever seen him and mostly snuggled and napped. You’d think it was because he was really active, but he never really got a burst of energy the whole time.
One of my favorite memories is our skit. Graham and I gathered five items into a black garbage bag then swapped with the other campers. We had to invent a skit based on all the contents of our bag and the words “gaga ball.” Graham really got into the storytelling - it was a Jippy and Dumper story of course - and didn’t show an ounce of stage fright since he was so into the story.
The story goes like this: Jippy and Dumper learn there’s buried treasure, the mythical gaga ball, and go in search of it at the beach. We decide to investigate a lone tree when a shark selling ice cream jumps out from behind it. We get some ice cream, but a frisbee knocks my ice cream into the sand. Also a stone gets thrown into the air and knocks us all over. The shark tells us where to dig, then we find the ball. Graham touches it, but it pokes him, and we decide to bury it again.
There were some crazy-awesome thunderstorms while we were at camp, with lots of rain. I suppose a few things were cancelled as a result, but we did still get to do one campfire.
We had a fabulous time and will definitely be back next year.
David Ello gave me a recommendation for a new book series, Peter and the Starcatchers. Looks like my kind of book!
We’re hoping to start the first book of the Corfu Trilogy by Gerald Durrell once we’ve finished The Extraordinary Education of Nicolas Benedict by Trenton Lee Stewart… and as soon as the order returns the correct book.
We hastily attempted to use Walmart. They sent us Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway instead. At least it was a classic…
We were delighted to host Jeremy, Bethany, Zeke and Rosie Elston at our home on the 12th! Their on a cross-country trip and dropped by for food, fellowship and a better place to sleep than a KOA between a truck depot and an airport.
Another leg of the Centennial Trail complete! It was actually a couple weeks ago but I’m just getting around to writing about it. I’ve added it to the first journey, episode 2.
#hiking #BlackHills #CentennialTrail
On this day in 2020 I wrote,
How does one stand in a line that wraps the DMV for two hours without growing irritable? It helps a lot to be reading about the suffering of six million Black Americans. “The Warmth of Other Suns” by Isabel Wilkerson.
Wilkerson’s #book was on my mind last night, as was Derek Bell’s “Faces At the Bottom of the Well”. My #conversion is ongoing, but I’m deeper than I was. Many thanks to my Uncle Mark for the timely recommendation three years ago!
#AmericanHistory
Amie and I went to our first play of the year at Black Hills Playhouse. What an enchanting venue, nestled deep in the Ponderosa pine, a tinkling creek winding between the campus buildings, and the cabin smell of the impressively professional stage room.
The play was outstanding. Funny, thought-provoking, and engrossing. When it travels, see it where you are.
I hiked my first leg of the #CentennialTrail last week!
I had to lower the entry barrier from a two-day hike to one, but an unexpected detour still made for a nine mile hike. More to come, but here’s my write-up of the journey.
Basement renovations are well on their way thanks to our friend and local contractor Steve and his family.
We purchased a swing for the boys at the start of May. There’s been so much laughter since.
Our good friend, and Royal’s godmother, Kati Ray, came to visit us in early May!
Kati brought gifts…
We went hiking…
Visited Crazy Horse Memorial…
And dropped by cousin Sarah’s Keystone convenience store for some Sarsaparilla!
It’d be impossible to overemphasize how happy we were to see Kati. So, so wonderful.
As of mid-May Royal is officially potty trained! Guess how many diapers I changed this week? Go ahead, I’ll wait.
Zero? ZERO? YES!!!!!
Graham’s birthday party was a space theme this year. We held it at a nearby park. So many people showed up. Comically, I don’t have many pictures of the birthday boy himself. He spent most of the time playing far from the action.
I’ve been on an unscheduled hiatus in May. We began to host visitors and I was battling some discouragement from some ministry opportunities that may be delayed. I’ll catch you up on the highlights soon!
And some funny pictures, just for a laugh.
We were amazed to discover that a friend of Amie’s, Jim Walker, from her days in Pittsburgh was riding the bus to Crazy Horse Memorial with us! He’s suffered terribly in the intervening years since the Hot Metal church plant, but Holy Spirit sent Amie and I to encourage him that his work has not been in vain.
For Graham’s birthday he and I went on our first camping trip together!
We set up the tent, explored the area, started a campfire, and roasted hot dogs and s’mores. Graham was so excited the first night that he couldn’t stop moving until nearly nine o’clock.
Since we had to reserve at least two nights, we picked up Amie and Royal and all of us stayed overnight for the second evening.
Graham had to work through some feelings when we arrived back at the campsite with Amie and Royal. He was happy that Royal was there, but also disappointed that he no longer enjoyed the woods undisturbed. But he and Royal got through it and had a glorious time pretending to be pterodactyls.
My friends Tommy, Gerry, Kim and Jennifer dropped in at the campsite. They’re in the Black Hills looking for a plot of land to bootstrap a retreat center. So glad we could visit with them!
Not long after the boys were put to bed it began to rain. Amie and I sat in the car to chat, but when we went to our tents I discovered Royal fast asleep on an island in the center of a pool of rainwater. I was ready to call it quits but Amie suggested we could fit into the two-person with she and Graham. So that’s what we did, though I joked that I’ll have more room in my coffin.
In spite of the tight squeeze and being cold, both boys thought the camping trip was spectacular and can’t wait to go again.
The day after our camping trip Royal tripped and smashed his forehead into a wall corner, knocking a gouge almost a half-inch long into his forehead. Blood everywhere. Shouting, cursing, and crying galore.
Gratefully we were able to get Royal in to see his regular doctor instead of the ER. It was a simple steri-strip and glue job. It took awhile for the adrenaline to run down.
My energy levels have been low for almost two weeks now. The same amount of time we’ve been assaulted by #allergies. Whether it’s the allergies or the allergy medication, it’s not great. We have about three months a year without allergy symptoms, January through March, and then it’s back to it. Ugh.
The term ‘accountability’ is frequently thrown around Christian circles. It fills me with unease because I think of it as giving another authority to punish me for failure. Which is why Dr. Cruickshank’s definition in her book, Ordinary Discipleship, is so helpful to me.
“But accountability is merely the ability to ask for an account of [my] actions.” (pg 143)
#trust #accountability #formation #discipleship #leadership
Just hours before our neighbors were coming over for tacos and fellowship they came down with a violent illness. We ran the tacos over to them anyways, but I’m annoyed when it seems our adversary has gotten the upper hand. The spiteful, petty resistance is wearisome.
It reminds me of the behavior of the Unman in C.S. Lewis' Perelandra.
“What chilled and almost cowed him was the union of malice with something nearly childish… this petty, indefatigable nagging…”
But victory will be mine.
Today is ultra-full.
So grateful Amie got me that 20oz latte this morning! 😘
Loving this song. All hail King Jesus!
If you ever wonder, what heaven looks like, it’s lookin' like me it’s lookin' like me and you (and I’m wearin' blue)
If you ever question, what heaven sounds like Just let it fill, just let it fill the room.
I was stoked when a #missionary family presented their call at #church yesterday. I went up to the husband afterward with hopes of learning from him about their successes/failures in their work in Rapid City (before they’ve moved to another country).
My hope sank level-by-level as I realized that he had no framework for #MakingDisciples and a view of #evangelism in the “build it and they will come” mentality 😭.
I’m grateful for the music of #CommonHymnal and #MaverickCityMusic.
The Praise & Protest album strikes at the heart of so much struggle in the U.S. for #truth and #justice (It’s been my demolition music-one needs to break something when listening). Kingdom Book One is a triumphant reprieve in the struggle for justice through remembrance of the live and victory through Jesus the Christ.
#recommendation #music
Ran a truck full of sheetrock, tires, baseboard and wall insulation to the dump today. Ah the memories…
Graham built this great white shark lego entirely by himself. It’s rated for seven-year-olds! Gotta be one of the coolest legos I’ve seen.
This is the most rational and persuasive plea to read the Bible I’ve ever read. My favorite quote:
“…the majority of [Christians] aren’t actually familiar with what the Bible says. Too many use the Bible as a self-help book that they read whenever they need a pick-me-up, while others use it mainly as a tool to manipulate others or make more money.”
I was explaining prompt engineering to Amie yesterday by sharing that AI can be trained to generate representations of character dialog, say Bart Simpson for example.
Instead of getting into the mind of Bart and writing all the new dialog for another episode, a writer could instead dialog with an AI to hone it’s impersonation of a character. Teach it to BE Bart Simpson.
I think a lot of the creativity remains, but now via computer dialog. And you move on to a new character.
For my part this actually sounds like a lot of fun. Instead of inventing lines for one scene of dialog in the next episode of The Next Best Thing™️, you could chat with the computer to fill out the character’s personality and history, give it the scenario, and let it generate the dialog.
“Hmmm, that’s not quite right, computer. Sorry, I mean Sonny. You’re skeptical about Fred because he stole that pencil from you in the 3rd grade. You know, before your parents moved to Seattle.”
I mentioned yesterday how happy I was using native #html, #css and #WebComponents to create a web interface for a service at work. Here’s my write-up of the project for those interested in more detail.
https://alexbilson.dev/resume/call-report-parser-visualized/
If I wasn’t already sold on vanilla #webcomponents when I began adding them to my personal #website, I am now that I’ve built an interactive frontend for a web service at work in 1,000 lines of vanilla #JavaScript, #HTML, and #CSS in only two days!
May it always draw my wonder and devotion that the rightful King of Creation uses his eternal authority to adopt and restore me, a privileged descendant of racists. Like a colonizing Roman centurion among Israel, I have no right to share in the blessing of Abraham and the children of the oppressed. But his mercy extends, scandalously, even to me. And now my life is not my own, but for him and his kingdom.
Until his victory over death is realized among every nation and community!
It’s my birthday! Amie and the boys made me the traditional deep dish apple pie - eight years running! To celebrate, here’s the recipe: how to make an apple pie.
Yesterday we brought over an ice cream cake to celebrate grandpa’s 70th birthday. Then we came home and tore down a wall. Graham managed almost three spaces at his height!
“A mark of maturity is surrendering to the person you actually are instead of the one you wish you were… Hate to break it to you, but the vision you’ve always had for your future won’t come true because that vision was predicated on the person you wish you were, not the person you actually are.”
Thank you David Perrell. I need to hear this.
For my 35th birthday Amie planned a three-day trip to Bighorn National Forest, about three hours west of us in Wyoming. The two of us haven’t been away on a trip together without the kiddos since Graham was born; five years! But just two days before our departure there was a severe storm warning all across Bighorn with a no-travel recommendation. Oh no!
Together we tossed together a local itinerary. First, a restful day in Rapid with a downtown hotel. Next some hiking and a lodge in the Black Hills. Lastly, an adventurous day skiing at a local ski mountain.
The morning was a rush to prepare for the trip. I hadn’t anticipated how much there’d be to do and was a bit grumpy. We did want to prepare everything well for Amie’s mom to watch the kids for the whole three days.
When at last we departed, Amie and I had the space to reconnect outside Harriet & Oak before getting coffee and brunch. This was one of many, many times I was grateful to be her husband. What a gift!
After delicious acai bowls and a pour-over, we walked down to the Alex Johnson for check-in. On our way we met a homeless man named Collin and his son-in-law Matthew Arapahoe. We walked them to a Starbucks for a little coffee and food. I have not yet called the number, but Collin gave me his daughter Heather’s phone number so I could help him get a state ID. We left Collin somewhat disappointed (he also wanted cash) and walked next door to check in.
Before we departed for Crazy Horse Memorial we visited a couple shops downtown. A spice shop that was more professional than most we’ve seen and a cookie shop where we split an oatmeal raisin cookie.
I joked on the way that, given the choice between visiting Rushmore or Crazy Horse, I’d choose Crazy Horse every time. I hadn’t been to either yet. But I did not expect what I found.
The granite carving is epic. It’s the largest carved statue in the world. But I thought that was all we were there to see. Instead I discovered that the statue is actually only the beginning of the vision of Chief Henry Standing Bear and Korczak Ziolkowski. They set out to create an entire campus, with a university, a hospital, and an airstrip, that would serve the Lakota people and preserve their heritage. From early on it was clear to Korczak that he wouldn’t see the work finished, but he and his wife Ruth laid the foundation for the entire project, even if it takes multiple centuries. He didn’t even get to see the face completed, but so great was his sense of honor to build a memorial for an entire people that he turned down more lucrative work elsewhere and ran two other businesses to fund the early years.
ℹ️
There's more that I could say, but you should go visit yourself. I plan to visit again this summer if you'd like to join me. It is a glimpse of the Kingdom, to see the peoples of this land honored as divine images and the generosity of spirit that created a memorial to remember their heroes without disparaging the colonists who invaded them.
We stayed at Crazy Horse until it closed, then drove ten minutes to Custer. It was a surreal experience shifting from a memorial honoring the Lakota tribe to a town honoring the U.S. colonel who attacked them. But that’s not why we came to Custer; we came for the food.
Amie had discovered Skogen Kitchen, a restaurant in the last series of nominations for a James Beard award. It’s easily the best restaurant in all of South Dakota. Somehow we’d gotten a reservation the day before–there were only about eight tables and none sat empty–and we were treated to a lovely meal. Amie’s favorite part was the espresso with a little sugar and a sliver of lemon peel.
We slept in and had a quiet brunch at a local Australian coffee shop, then headed into the Black Hills. This time north since we were staying at Spearfish Canyon Lodge at the north end of the Black Hills.
We’d planned to go for a hike longer hike when we arrived but the weather became foggy and the snow piled up as we gained elevation. We chose to check in at the lodge early instead, but not before we stopped to enjoy the quiet snowfall.
After we checked into the lodge we found a shorter hike near the lodge. To Amie’s surprise there was a beautiful waterfall she didn’t even know existed!
When we returned to the lodge we noticed that a few more people had arrived. Wanting to have the hot tub to ourselves, we jumped in our swimsuits and headed to the outer deck. It’s exhilarating to walk onto a snowy deck in 20℉ weather with nothing but a swimsuit.
The warm soak made us hungry so we went straight to an early dinner after. Then it was time to break out my birthday present; a new board game called Sleeping Gods.
After our second relaxing day it was time for adventure. To the ski slopes!
Neither of us have been skiing in twenty years and we were nervous. After we picked up brunch at a coffee shop in Lead, we headed over to get our ski rentals. It took less than ten minutes to get fitted and head to Terry Peak.
We started on the bunny hill and I thought for sure that I’d fall on my face. But we managed to get to the bottom without incident and the memories were flooding back. Overjoyed to be outside in the beauty and the exhilaration of skiing, I said “let’s go to the top!”
By the time we’d made it all the way down the mountain, I felt like no time had passed since I’d donned skis. Amie gave me several tips to improve my atrocious form and I was ready to move up to blue runs.
I’d thought we wouldn’t endure the full four hours until the lifts closed, but that’s exactly what we did. It was a perfect amount of time, there were almost no others on the slopes, and we had a spectacular time. I did crash once, but I was moving slowly and it was comical.
My birthday was the best staycation of all time. How I needed to get away with Amie for a few days of rest and adventure.
Here are a few highlights from Royal’s birthday celebration last Saturday.
In the morning Royal opened our gift. Our gift philosophy tends towards longevity and versatility. Royal’s imagination has exploded in the last three months and we wanted to either get him a dollhouse or a cooking station. We ended up with the dollhouse because I thought it’d be more fun for we adults 😜.
The family get-together was lunch at Texas Roadhouse. I’m reminded yet again that the “traditional” celebrations are not fun. It was good to see the family, but Amie and I would have been much less stressed out if we’d just had everyone over for lunch. I probably won’t succeed every time, but I’m considering boycotting all restaurant gatherings for the next five years.
The day was bitterly cold so we opted for the indoor dinosaur museum over the outdoor air and space museum. The boys flew through all fifty dinosaur models in fifteen minutes, but they spent a long time in a tiny mirror maze at the end of the tour. It was especially nice that the grandparents were there to share watching them.
It was a busy day, with so many out of the ordinary events. The boys and I were all grateful to go hiking the next morning on a familiar trail for a nature reset.
Lastly, here’s an amazing, hilarious video of Royal standing on the stove, talking about what, and who, he wants at his birthday.
Graham started with a cough a few days ago and Royal had croup-style breathing all last night. Amie’s next, then after her, me.
It helps to look at prior logs to see when we were last sick. Mid-February as it turns out. So almost five weeks well! That’s a record in the Bilson family household.
Of course, this happens a few days before the special birthday trip Amie planned for me 😩. At least Royal was well for his birthday celebration.
#parenting #sickness
Amie shares with me the best discoveries from her continuing education requirements. Here’s a write-up from a fascinating research article on the subject of #motivation.
I’m thinking of motivation from a #parenting lens, but the findings are equally important for #coaching or #employment.
Enjoy!
https://alexbilson.dev/plants/parenting/human-motivation-is-a-moving-continuum/#jump
Since he was born, Royal has never shown any hesitation to jump. Never.
My #exercise #habit has been slowly paying off.
I began on January 3rd aiming for exercise there times a week. In reality, I’ve only exercised 8 times in January, 2 times in February (sick), and 6 times in March (so far).
Even with such inconsistencies I’ve at least doubled my capacity in every set.
It’s a great competence builder, this little bit of exercise.
When you are spent, how do you #rest with others?
For several years now the main tools Amie and I have for rest together are, in order of frequency, television, books, and board games. We need more options that require little mental or physical effort to compete with the temptation of drowning our exhaustion in a tv show.
Last Thursday our neighbors came over for a last-minute #DiscoveryBibleStudy. We read Jesus’ kingdom parable where the farmer plants wheat but an enemy sows weeds.
We sped through with only an hour for a group of six. Had a slightly heated discussion about interpreting since Jesus actually does explain this one later.
It was personally fruitful to realize that the farmhands’ question was central to understanding the parable, but Jesus curiously leaves them out of his explanation.
My obedience from our last #DiscoveryBibleStudy is talk with the Father about his plan to let the weeds grow alongside the wheat. Like the farmhands, who questioned the farmer’s seed and his farming wisdom, I share their confusion that the kingdom on earth is fraught with weeds. Instead of advancing in victory and moving to the next place, each success is mixed with defeat. The weeds choke out the wheat so that they do not reach full potential. It is the most inefficient strategy I can imagine.
#prayer
Father, give Andrew and Laura courage to speak openly about what you are teaching them of your love and presence. Draw the members of the rock-climbing community to your delightful love and call them to follow your Son. Bring repentance to team members who have become more concerned about behavior than right relationship and form a vulnerable, committed apostolic team at Basecamp. For the kingdom eternal, do it.
Our dojo time has been mostly pillow fights. There’s something very, very satisfying about hearing “stop talking, Papa!” and “Leave me alone!” all day, then getting to wallop Royal with a pillow 😄.
Oh how the boys love gymnastics courses! Both managed to land on the pillows, for the most part. Graham hit the pillows then did a somersault and bumped his head against the wall. So we put more pillows along the wall 😊.
This song gets me every time.
“I pray you catch a wave that doesn’t subside this for the nappy heads in heaven with a nappy head Christ by they side.”
Do it, Lord.
Dr. Cruickshank is writing a book on disciple-making?! Woohoo!
And now I’ve got it on pre-order. What a stellar surprise awaits me in May!
Amie and I have been reading The Mysterious Benedict Society series by Trenton Lee Stewart. We’re almost through the second #book.
The characters are so great. Milligan’s monologue in the first book is captivating. Constance is a riot (and very like a toddler - I should know), and Kate is my favorite.
The boys will probably love this series when they can read.
Amie’s been sharing lots of crafts with the boys in the last week. I’m so impressed by her thoughtfulness and creativity. She’d say that the ideas came from others, but it’s her inspiration that implements them for our boys.
One such project was swirling color into a pan full of shaving cream. In the first try, the color never made it to the pan. But in the second, when Amie smoothed the shaving cream herself, they added some color!
This project was an inspiration from Black History Month. It’s their space paintings.
And this craft is to make flowers using cupcake holders on popsicle sticks.
Amie and the boys built this awesome marble run with some PVC pipe we’d gotten for a Halloween costume last year.
Graham purchased a volcano kit with his birthday money last year.
I’m proud of Graham’s structural design skill. See what he can build!
Since we were sick with the flu the first two weeks of February the habits of exercise, meditation and memorization that started so well in January need a jumpstart.
I’ve found that since the flu, #qigong breathing exercises have required more focus than before. My body is still distressed even though flu symptoms have faded.
In #exercise, I’d just started two sets before illness and it’s kicking my butt now. Slowly starting to build up motivation.
#Memorization is at a standstill.
After the #dmm summit, two priorities were impressed upon me: to focus on my family as my primary team of disciple-makers, and to lean into warfare #prayer.
Amie and I have enjoyed several conversations about team Bilson. Amie and I are praying together more than ever, and I’m praying with the boys some too.
Last Saturday the Spirit offered me an awesome chance to inspire a men’s meeting towards prayer, and tomorrow my friend who owns a rock-climbing gym will be over to pray.
So excited!
In my early 20’s guilt followed any “unproductive” time. As a parent in my early 30’s the guilt is less pronounced. I’ve come to realize that true down time pays for itself in more energy tomorrow.
What has not ceased to bother me, however, are those times when I am unproductive, not for resting, but to hide from my feelings.
Anyways, time to read The Farthest Shore by Ursula K Le Guin.
I’ve heard about the #Asbury #revival from multiple sources. Today I discovered that similar revivals have started in further universities, some hundreds of miles apart.
This is joyous news, but it feels far away and irrelevant for our lives. I find myself hoping this renewal among Christians will be more than a momentary response to the close presence of the Holy Spirit. May He spark a movement of obedient disciples who make disciples to the hundredth generation.
I’m grateful that yesterday was a bank holiday. It was good to have an extra day off after illness to remember what’s important.
Amie and I enjoyed a date morning at a local Australian coffee shop that almost felt like we were back in Chicago. In the afternoon I met up with Andrew at Westminster for a chat about work, #dmm, and prayer. We’ve got an evening of prayer for his rock-climbing business on the calendar in a couple weeks.
I refer to #dmm in my log entries, but I don’t know that a web search does the acronym justice. It stands for #DiscipleMakingMovements. This video by Harry Brown from New Generations explains the ethos, though not the practices, that comprise this yet-another-three-letter-acronym.
The DMM Summit in Mesa, AZ three weeks back was inspiring and life-giving. I’m so happy to have met others in the region who share our passion! Many of the talks have been uploaded to the DMM YouTube channel; I’m sending links to friends and re-watching them with Amie.
There were a couple key take-aways.
First, our team is primary and foremost the four of us (me, Amie, Graham and Royal). I am asking Jesus about how to equip and support my little family as a team of disciple-making disciples. This is a monumental task and I’m still working out how to break it down into achievable milestones.
Second, I need to improve how I engage with invisible spiritual powers. This is a life theme that Jesus is reminding me of again, and I am exploring how to train.
While I was in Arizona, Amie, Jaynne, Wes, Graham and Royal were hard at work priming and painting our entire vaulted living room. I was so surprised when I walked through the door!
I no longer have flu symptoms, but was still fatigued when we hosted our friends yesterday. I’m so glad we did.
The boys and Skyler’s kids had a great time for the most part. Skyler and I talked about #qigong, #evolution, stages of #faith development, out of body experiences, dreams and visions, invisible spiritual #evil and more. It’s validating to my conviction that I must learn more effectively to fight spiritual battles. And nice not to feel so lonely.
I built a local demo site with the #11ty static-site generator (#SSG). I was particularly interested in the #WebC template for vanilla #WebComponents. It was a cinch to write web components that are integrated into another template language like Nunjucks. Win!
The documentation is poor. I needed an overview of the build steps and configuration options, but that’s not forthcoming. However, I have enough experience with the tools to get stuff working, along with example sites on GitHub.
I had read my first Ursula K Le Guin a couple months ago, A Wizard of Earthsea. It was so good I felt it was worth getting the rest of the series.
OneDrive has done it again. The image embed feature has disappeared for new photos. That’s the last straw.
You may notice my images will slowly be replaced with WebP versions. These are much smaller in file size while looking good for the Web. Rotation might be wonky while I figure out which need to be flipped.
The DMM Summit was wonderful, but I’ve had no time to write about it since our family came down with the flu the day I returned. A week later and we’re only just recovering a little. More to come.
The DMM Summit is almost here! There are many topics running through my head and thus little time to build anticipation, but that’ll change when I’m on the plane bound southward.
Highlights: wearing sandals in February, visiting old friends, hiking in Tonto National, and the opportunity to start new friendships with those who seek movements in North America.
This page an incredible feat. Not only for its history and wit, but that it describes, in a way, itself.
https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2015-paul-ford-what-is-code/
I’ve also hit my January exercise goal. Started with a baseline of 10 push-ups, 30 sit-ups, 25 squats and 20 military presses. Today I did 15, 50, 40, and 30. Yes! 🙌🏻
Next month will be fewer repetitions, but two sets instead of one.
Good progress so far. Have the first three chapters of Hebrews memorized, and starting on the first portion of the next. 🥳
Now that I have a good chunk in my cranium I’ll need more organization to keep from losing my place. Currently I’m seeing a strong relationship between the first two chapters, then 3:1-4:14.
One of our favorite places to hike is the Flume Trail. We’ve been up to the tunnels on several occasions, but this this our first time when the river’s frozen over.
At this extreme latitude the sun makes a low arc over the horizon rather than an overhead crossing which produces hills brown on one half and white on the other. Magical.
Sometimes I’m exasperated with Graham because he‘ll fixate on his work and forget about bodily needs then have a meltdown when he becomes aware of himself again. Which is something I do on a weekly basis.
You get it from me Graham, you get it from me… #parenting
I attempted something unusual today.
I’ve been reading about Qi (pronounced ‘chi’) and pondering the breathing and movement principles in #qigong and #taiji. I’m so ignorant, but curiosity will cure that in time.
Anyways, so I (poorly) attempted to emulate forms I’ve seen in an act of both internal regulation and external worship. Now I wonder: what’s been written about #qi/#chi and Christian #worship?
This is all in service of developing personal spiritual disciplines for my season of life.
I’ve not had this degree of doubt about my capacity to keep to any habit for some time. But I’m convinced it’s crucial to find a way.
Nearing the end of January, #memorization is holding. Almost through Hebrews 3. #Exercise is spotty, but progress is still evident with only four tries (and I was sick for a bit). Unexpectedly, I may also add something from #Qigong/#Taiji. I’m having more success in part, I believe, because I’m working on #habits with at least one other.
I’m trying out the Arc browser today. I have some hesitancy about using another browser than Safari; what if I like it and it goes away? But experiencing new ways to explore the Web is worth it.
What intrigues me most is the note and easel integration. I think these, combined with split panes, could make research feel more fluid.
In honor of Martin Luther King Jr., Amie and I watched Descendant last night.
One of the unanswered questions about the horror of Clotilda’s theft of one-hundred and ten people from Africa to slavery in Mobile, Alabama in 1859 is the question of justice. How does one make right such a grevious wrong? There was no satisfactory answer.
Somehow the transfer of assets from the Meaher estate to his captives feels insufficient. I wonder if the insufficiency of financial restitution lies in the absence of purification? It may be true that restoration demands both justice and purification.
I’m registered for the DMM Summit!
https://newgenerations.givevirtuous.org/Event/dmm-summit---phoenix
We’re sick. Again.
It’s been a little while since we were all sick, but the time feels truncated. It’s probably because activity between is fast-paced then illness slows everything to a crawl.
The turmoil of fears and worries boils to the surface when we’re ill. It’s both insightful, since it reveals what hides beneath the surface, but distorted and amplified by fatigue.
My post from three years ago still holds true: https://alexbilson.dev/plants/parenting/a-parents-relationship-to-sickness/
Had a lovely conversation with Chris Boette today about digital gardens, note-gathering and note-taking, and parenting. I am freshly grateful for tools like Calendly that hold space in my calendar for unexpected conversation with total strangers.
We’ve both been impressed by Matt Webb and also too intimidated to schedule a call with him!
It was a rough night for our almost-three-year-old, Royal. Reason: undetermined. I don’t usually notice, but today he woke me at 4:00 a.m. It’s going to be a caffeine-drowned day. #parenting #coffee
Sometimes I have a vague sense of danger and unease about my life. Parenthood, work and friendship are all good, but their gravity pulls all my attention into their orbit. Be a better parent, make my next career move, form new friendships… it never stops.
But how often am I among the desperate? When do I rub shoulders with the outcast, or befriend the poor? My social and physical location seems a hundred miles from where I’d expect to find Jesus, and thus where I must be.
Yesterday was one of the most consistently fun days in recent memory.
It started with a miracle; the boys slept until 8:15! We had an easy breakfast, then headed to the premier sledding hill around 11:00.
We left for lunch well before any meltdown could happen (we were also well stocked on snacks) and went to Sheels to purchase Graham a pair of new gloves. Amie and I picked up Noodles & Co. and I enjoyed a brief chat with Tommy.
We drove around for a half-hour to let Royal take a nap, but he never fell asleep. And to my surprise, the boys were willing to go back to the sledding hill. So that’s exactly what we did.
Royal was really upset when some boys accidentally decapitated a snowman he’d helped build, so we built our own in the front yard.
We opened our Christmas packages from Memaw-campfire poles-and I built a fire to keep us warm and to grill hot dogs.
All of that would have made it a wonderful day, but then we also played a game of Terraforming Mars! 🥳
Realized afresh how fearful and necessary is vulnerability. I wish it’d get easier, but it might take more courage as I age.
Amie suggested a vulnerability goal this year. Gonna read Brené Brown’s Daring Greatly again for ideas.